What to Do When You Dread Going Home

For years, I couldn't put my back to a door.

And to be honest, I still can't. If Catherine and I went out to

eat, I picked the seat, back to the wall, facing the entrance,

where I could see everybody who came in. She got used to I'd be

sitting across a table from my wife, and my eyes would be

working the room without me telling them to. That's what a

job in law enforcement does to You spend a shift scanning,

reading hands and exits, and being on high alert for hours at

a time. It keeps you alive out there. Then, the shift ends, and

nobody hands you a switch to turn it off. Now, this was later

in my career. The kids were grown and gone by then, so it

was just Catherine at home. I'd pull in, worn out, still running

at the same setting I'd been running at all day, and walk

into a house that had been peaceful until I opened the door.

She deserved better than what I was bringing home. So, I started

doing one thing on the drive home. I'll come back to that one

thing, but first,

welcome to Daily Devotions for Busy Lives. I'm Bart Leger. Not

everybody works a job like that, but a lot of people know that

feeling of dread on the way home. You leave work, and somewhere on

the drive, something tightens in your chest at the thought of

pulling into the driveway. Maybe one of your kids is struggling,

and every evening turns into a battle. Maybe things with your

spouse are strained, and the air in the house goes tense the

second you walk in. Home is supposed to be the place you

finally get to rest. Part of the trouble is that the day doesn't

stay at work. Whatever wound you up there rides home in the car

with you. It walks in the door, on your face, and in your voice

before you've said a single word.

There's a proverb about how a home gets built. Listen to

Proverbs 24, 3, and 4.

house is built. That's slow work done over time.

Then look at verse 4. The room fills up with treasure. That's a

picture of what a home becomes over years of wise, ordinary

choices, a place stocked with warmth and safety. You can't buy

in a It gets built the same slow way. It gets torn down a little

at a time, one evening after another. Here's the part that's

really easy to miss. You are one of the things that decides what

a home feels like. I couldn't control what kind of day

Catherine had. I could control which version of me walked

through that door. For a long time, I'd been assuming home was

something that happened to me when I got there.

it every evening in the first 90 seconds. So here's the one thing

I started doing. I turned the radio off. That's it. No music

on the radio and no phone. Just the road and the sound of the

tires the whole way home. And in that silence, I prayed. Not long

prayers. Now, I'd tell God what I'd seen that day and hand it to

Him. Then I'd ask Him to make me the man Catherine needed walking

through that door instead of the man that day had made me. By the

time I pulled in, I'd left most of it out on the road. That

drive became the most important few minutes of my day. Same road,

same tires. But I walked in different because I'd handed God

the day and asked Him to hand me back the right version of myself.

The house was better for it. Here's today's challenge. Before

you walk in tonight, take at least two minutes of your

commute and turn the radio off. Tell God about your day and hand

it to Him. Then ask Him one thing. Make me the person my

household needs when I come through that door. You can't

control what's waiting on the other side. But you can decide

who walks in. Father, you know the ones listening who feel the

knot on the drive home. Thank you that a home can be rebuilt

over time, one evening at a time, by the small things we bring

through the door. Before we walk in tonight, meet us on the road.

Take the day off our shoulders and make us the spouse or parent

our people need. Build our houses by your wisdom the slow

way until they feel like peace again. In Jesus' name, amen.

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Thank you so much. And thanks for joining me on Daily

Devotions for Busy Lives. Remember, a home gets built by

wisdom over time, and the version of you that walks

through the door tonight is part of the building. Come back next

time for more encouragement to help you live grounded in God's

truth. Until then, God bless and have a great day.